Hermitness.

[drcuriosity]

I'm feeling just a bit like a social pariah at the moment. This isn't a pity post, though.

Some people whom I have in the past considered friends seem to have pretty much stopped talking to me, for some reason. There are a few people around the place who say that we really ought to catch up sometime, but won't let themselves be nailed down to actually doing so.

So. If I've inadvertently done some crap that makes you not want to associate with me, let me know. I can't fix things I don't know are broken, and if things are irrevocably broken I'd rather not keep exercising my futility. If you'd really rather not socialise with me, and are only saying things like that to be "nice", let me know. Bite the bullet, and kick that puppy. It'll be less painful for everyone in the long run. It's only the constantly reopening wounds that I can't heal.

Don't think I won't miss you, though. I may do already.

Comments

Okay, now that *really* sticks in my craw.

[drcuriosity]

"...and through lack of contact grow away from people."

And then there are people who sever all contact with me, saying that they don't think they can trust me (knowing, or so I thought, how important a thing trust is to me, and having seen me not take sides between friends at odds in the past). Who suddenly appear in the same city as me, and want to be buddy-buddy friends again for some reason, after all this time.

That's a rather good way to make me grow away from someone. Forgive me if I haven't been so good at rebuilding the bridges you two have burned. It's hard for me to get back into a friendship after that kind of hurtful slight to my character, and with people who don't consider me trustworthy - a bit of a frailty of mine, I'm afraid. Still, trying - but please, don't expect any overnight miracles.

[Reply to comment in reply to my reply to the first comment, both deleted by their author]

[drcuriosity]

I've seen that tone of voice before. Apologies if my honesty was ill-timed - I deliberately waited until I wasn't feeling hurt and angry to post a reply, whether it seems that way or not. I know you have other important things weighing heavy on your mind right now.

Of course you can trust me? Unless you tell me you've done an about face, how am I to know that? I'm not used to people I care about cutting themselves off from me without warning, so I don't really know what the etiquette for such situations is. It would be foolish for me to make assumptions based on what I don't know. I hope you can understand my confusion about this whole situation.

Still. Going back to the main post - if you'd rather I didn't try, let me know. Otherwise, I'll do the best I can.